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Was I raped?

In the beginning, I told my boyfriend that I don't want to have sex outside of marriage and he accepted that.

But then, about a week ago, I made a very big mistake and allowed him to take my clothes off completely and enter my vagina slightly. I know it was wrong and the following day I told him that I didn't feel right about it and I didn't want us to do that again.

Unfortunately, the very next day, we were alone together, and we got a bit carried away again. But when he tried to "enter" me, I said: "I think we should stop now, let's stop — ok? Please, let's stop now. I don't feel right about this." But he didn't... he spread my legs anyway and got on top of me. And he penetrated me quite deeply. As he was doing it, I was saying, "Stop, please, I really think we should stop," but I didn't push him away. I didn't physically PUSH him or something to make him stop.

I was quite shook up afterwards but I didn't know if I should be angry with him or not. We are still together and I don't even think he thinks he did anything wrong... DID he do anything wrong? Or is what he did alright because my body wasn't saying "no"? I didn't fight him physically. Do you think I was raped? I'm so confused and I've lost all my self-respect!

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health Relationships

Does pot impair long-term learning?

I typically don't smoke that much weed, especially during the school year. Last year, for instance, I smoked maybe once a month. This summer, though, my friends and I have all hit the bong pretty hard. I'm worried such frequency over a few months could impair my long-term capacity for learning. Is there any salt to this concern?

Topics:

Substance Use and Recovery

Why promote health?

The demographic transformation in our society resulted from better living conditions and improved health status. Why should we promote health when long life spans only create health, economic, and social problems for us?

Topics:

General Health

Am I bulimic, or is it just a phase?

I am a college freshman and I think I'm on my way to becoming bulimic. Since my junior year of high school, I have periodically binged and tried to purge, but I was never really successful and it was never frequent. My senior year I made myself semi-successfully throw up for the first time, but it was gross and scary and made my throat bleed and I stopped. However, since I've gotten to school this year, I feel like things have gotten out of control. I started out eating healthfully and losing weight, because I am about 15 pounds overweight and need to make a lower weight class for my sport. (I am at a high level and compete internationally.) I'm also terrified of the "freshman fifteen" since I've always been chubby at the least. I couldn't keep up my healthy eating and snapped, and now I binge all the time and for the past few weeks have been throwing up. I think I could stop but I'm not sure. Am I bulimic or just going through typical freshman food phase?

Thanks for any advice.

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health Nutrition and Physical Activity

Will living in New York City make my asthma worse?

I desperately want to attend school in NYC, but have one reservation. I'm asthmatic and I'm afraid that my asthma will be worse in a big city. I traveled to NYC for a week this summer and was fine, but have heard it could be worse in the winter. Can you advise me? I so don't want to let my asthma limit my dream of going to school in NYC.

Topics:

General Health

Is it okay to feel lightheaded and dizzy after physical activity?

1) When I do a 3-mile or 5-mile run, I run for time and try to finish with nothing in the tank. The closer I get to the end, the more I push myself, because I know I don't need to sustain the effort much longer. When I stop running, I suddenly get very light-headed and dizzy. It never happens while I'm running. I walk briskly while I'm warming down, but that doesn't prevent it. Why does this happen? Is it dangerous?

2)  Sometimes after jogging a while, or cycling a great distance, my head begins to spin and I feel as if I'm going to pass out. Is it normal to have feelings like these, and if so, how intense should these feelings be?

Topics:

Nutrition and Physical Activity

What about emotional abuse?

I notice in your mental health section, you only have info on sexual abuse. What is emotional abuse? I've heard a lot about it lately, but it doesn't seem very real to me. How can simply being called names, or whatever, be as devastating as people say? Short of being threatened with murder, what people say is just words. I can't seem to find very good articles about emotional abuse on the web.

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health

Is hypnosis an effective form of therapy?

What is your opinion about hypnosis? Is it dangerous? Does it really work? I have a few issues about my personality that I would like to work on and the more I read about hypnosis, the more I think this is what I need. It almost sounds like magic to me. Would this kind of therapy help me with my many problems such as: self-confidence, communication problems, control of my emotions, sexual intercourse pain, etc.? As you see, I have quite a few things to work on and I really hope that hypnosis will help me. However, I wanted to get your opinion about it before I go ahead and do it. Thank you very much for your wise advice.

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health

How do I begin to talk with my children about sex?

I have three young daughters (ages 8, 6, and 3 years), and I know that it is about time to begin teaching them and talking to them about sexual issues. But my mother never talked to me about such things, so I really don't know where to begin. I do need to do it soon, though, because I was molested as a child and I don't want my girls to go through the same thing, you know, thinking they have no one to talk to about such things. Because my Mother never believed me when I told her that someone had molested me, I want my girls to be able to talk to me about anything. But I am very shy and easily embarrassed by certain issues, such as sex. How can I overcome this, and how do I spark a conversation about sex with a six-year-old, what should or shouldn't she know, and how can I explain things so she will understand? Same thing for the three-year-old.

Topics:

Mental and Emotional Health Relationships

Why did she break up with me?

I don't know what I did wrong. My girlfriend of one and a half years broke up with me out of the blue. We never fought or argued. I asked her why, she said "I don't know." I asked her what did I do wrong and she said "nothing." She was my first ever girlfriend and I was planning to ask her to marry me. I don't understand what I did wrong. There has to be a reason. Why won't she tell me?

Topics:

Relationships

Why do some people gag when someone is vomiting?

Why is it that when a person vomits, it causes others to vomit — even when they don't have an illness causing it? Is this something triggered by the brain or is it something that happens by reflex (survival instinct) for someone to vomit since, perhaps, what the first person was eating may affect the second who vomits as well?

Topics:

General Health

Can our relationship survive summer break if we haven't had sex yet?

I am a 19-year-old college student and am seriously involved with my boyfriend who is a 20-year-old college student. We have even talked of getting married someday. Our relationship is very close and we talk about everything, and he is very wonderful and supportive. I feel very committed to him and would really like to have sex with him. We have tried twice, but it hasn't really worked out because my vagina is too tight. I am pretty sure the problem is just that it needs to be stretched more, because I have been to the gynecologist and don't have any infections. He says that he is okay with whatever we do and that he loves me no matter what, but I still feel guilty about not being able to go all the way. How do I get over this guilt? I will be leaving college for the summer soon and we will be separated for awhile and I want to make sure that our relationship is as solid as possible before I leave so we have the absolute best chances of surviving the summer!

Topics:

Relationships Sexual and Reproductive Health

How do I tell my girlfriend I'm sterile?

I am an 18-year-old male. And I lost my ability to reproduce in a bull riding accident at a rodeo I competed in about two years ago. I would like to father children more than anything. And now I have a girlfriend who is talking of wanting to have kids in the future. But I can't bring myself to tell her that I can't because I still haven't dealt with the problem of coping with it myself. I need to know how to deal with the fact I cannot have kids, especially now that my significant other wants them, but is ignorant to the fact that I am sterile. Please help me ASAP! This is tearing me apart.

Topics:

Relationships Sexual and Reproductive Health

Will past experimentation with drugs lead to permanent brain damage?

I have a history of "experimentation" (infrequent or occasional use of ecstasy, 'shrooms, and other drugs — mostly prescription pills). I am completely sober now, but am worried about long-term damage to my brain. I used drugs infrequently (no more than three to five times for each substance), but drank regularly. How worried should I be? Is there anything I can do to combat long-term effects?

Topics:

Substance Use and Recovery

Is neck and back cracking all it's cracked up to be?

1) I read the information on your website about knuckle cracking, and I was wondering if it applies to cracking backs and necks. I know that people often have their backs cracked by friends, etc. because it feels good and seems to relieve tension. Also, when my neck feels tight, I often turn it from side to side until it cracks and feels better. I've heard that chiropractors do some version of this, and call it "realignment." Is this safe? Is there a right or a wrong way to crack a back or neck? Is cracking your back/neck actually therapeutic in some way?

2) As a college student, I sometimes spend long hours reading books or looking at computer screens, and often my neck gets stiff. Like many of my joints that get stiff, sometimes I crack my neck, like I would crack my knees or fingers when they feel stiff. I often wind up doing this several times a day.

My question is, could I do irreparable damage to my spinal system if I continue using this method to soothe a stiff neck? Could I wind up a paraplegic if I continue to crack my neck? Leak spinal fluid, etc.?

Topics:

General Health
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