How do I understand my racial identity?

I'm black and I have many white friends. It doesn't bother me at all until I get around a lot of other black people or around certain family members. Sure some joke around with me saying I'm an "Oreo." But it really gets to me. I'm tired of people saying "acting white" or "acting black" or "the man keeps putting the black man down." It doesn't take long for race to come up in a conversation with some people. And that's when I really feel out of my element. I know no race is perfect. But I feel like where blacks are now is nowhere near what Dr. King was fighting for. Maybe I'm too emotional about it, but everyday I still wake up black.

For instance, I love all types of music, including rock, classical and country music. And these are some reactions: 1. Why am I listening to that "white people music"? and 2. I feel out of place if I don't know one of the latest rap songs. It's little things like this that just make me want to wish there weren't any races. But races and different cultures are beautiful and so much can be learned. I'm happy and comfortable with myself, but not my race as a whole. And on some days, it really gets me down to a point where I just cry. Am I just chasing an insatiable dream?


Is my vegetarian diet making me feel tired?

I am a vegetarian and frequently feel like it takes a long time to "wake up" in the morning and some days I feel like I never quite get there. I can't help but think this may be diet related. I went to a doctor for a test for anemia which was negative and I always try to get a good nights' sleep (six to eight hours). In the past I have tried to gain weight and failed miserably. I remain a little underweight but get a good deal of exercise each day. Any ideas?


How can I deal with disapproval of my interracial relationship?

My question is about interracial relationships. I came here from a really small town, very conservative — well, you get the idea. Now, my second week in, I met the most wonderful man. Only he is black. We have been dating now for over a year. He treats me wonderfully but I still get odd looks from people and my parents really don't approve.

I told them it shouldn't matter what color his skin is if I love him, but their small town values seem to say otherwise. How can I cope with the odd looks and my parents without losing my man?


Are there health concerns associated with consuming Sucralose (Splenda)?

1) What are your thoughts regarding the use of Splenda as a sugar substitute? I have heard that the body is not able to metabolize this and that it is excreted through the urine. Do you have any current research on Splenda and the side effects? I realize it is a relatively new product. Thank you!

2) I searched the archives and found no information on Splenda or sucralose. Lately, it seems like Splenda is gaining popularity in the crowded sugar-substitute category. It seems too good to be true — measures cup for cup like sugar, you can bake with it and mix it into drinks, and it is made from sugar so it really tastes like sugar. My two questions are... is this a safe product, or are there some disadvantages with the product? And secondly, if it is very safe and versatile, why aren't more companies using it now?


Is reusing water bottles safe?

I started buying bottled water because it seemed to taste better. As an experiment, I tried refilling the empty bottles with tap water and refrigerating them. And I discovered that what I really liked was drinking chilled water out of the bottle. If no one else is using the bottles, how often do I need to wash the bottles out with soap as opposed to just re-filling them?