Hi! I have a question about orgasms. I'm a female who has masturbated since her early teens and wonder if I've "overdone" it somewhat. I did it so frequently (sometimes every other day or so; sometimes I waited longer) that now that I'm in my early 20s, I find it harder to reach orgasm, and harder to have multiple orgasms (it used to come so easily to me). Have I "lost" that momentum? Can I regain it if, say, I stopped masturbating for several weeks or months?

Also, my partner stimulates me manually or with his tongue, and I haven't been able to "come" yet... is it because I've masturbated too much? Do women take longer to come? I think he gets bored doing it...

1) Having read a few posts related to the question, "Is masturbation harmful?", most of the answers I've seen seem to suggest that the only possible harm could be psychological, in the sense that masturbation may be a distraction from one's normal routine.

What about the actual PHYSICAL side effects? Some things can not be dismissed as mere "wives' tales"! For example, when I masturbate often, I do notice a darkening under my eyes. I am only 28, but having been at this a while, it does seem as though I can not as easily become erect, or stay erect for as long as I used to. I may not have grown hair on my palms, but I have noticed (and I'm willing to concede that there may be no causal relationship here) that I have become somewhat hairier, in all the wrong places.

Please set the record straight as to what, if any, harmful PHYSICAL side effects may result from masturbation, and why, in the face of my testimonial and no doubt countless others, such symptoms as I have described are dismissed by yourself and your peers as "myths."

2) Does masturbation affect your growth if you are not yet fully grown?

I'm 18 years old and have never had sex. But three years ago, I started masturbating. And this past week I have been having swelling in my vagina. You can't get any STD on your own, can you? I'm scared to go to the doctor because I don't want my Mom to know I have been doing this. Please respond.

What does one do when they are desensitized to their vibrator and need to check a consumer report before investing in a new one?

1) I'm not an inexperienced girl at masturbation. I've been doing it for a very long time, but actually only ever discovered what an orgasm was when I was 18 and got my first vibrator. This never bothered me because I wasn't sexually active then, but now it does. I realized I have NEVER been able to orgasm from physical touching or from just using fingers. I've always needed a vibrator of sorts and this is worrying me for future relationships and stuff with partners. How can I learn to orgasm from touch instead of vibration? I've tried before and have always just gotten frustrated or fallen asleep.

2) I've sorta been curious lately about what it feels like to do the big M using my fingers. I'm uncomfortable doing it though. I can't even use a tampon let alone do THAT with my fingers and I don't have anything that vibrates. What other options do I have?

Do you think it is ok for boys to masturbate in really tight womens clothing such as bathing suits and bodysuits, tight overalls etc. If not, where can I get some help. Please help me.

What's the deal with Traumatic Masturbatory Syndrome? Is it real or some sort of hoax?

I have searched your files for the answer to a question that has long been bugging me. It has to do with masturbation. I can see by the questions there are many men who masturbate, but I don't see many from women. Do many women masturbate? Are they just more shy about talking about it? Can you give any specifics on the percentage of women, versus the percentage of men, who masturbate?

Your masturbation section is overflowing with male inquiries, so I thought I'd throw my question in to add some variety. What are ways to optimize female masturbation? I often read dirty books to get things going, but I don't always reach my intended destination. I have trouble reaching orgasm while flying solo, and I'd really like to learn more about the female erogenous zones and how to optimize my masturbation experience. Basically, how can I best bring myself to pleasure through self-stimulation?

Are there toys that guys can use for masturbation and how do they work?